Oh Lord

Oh Lord! Oh my Sweet Lord!!!! I miss her so much! I miss her with my entire being! And I call out to you God. Please Lord, fill the void with your precious promise of love. I need you God. I need you night and day. I need you during persecution. I love, yet who can love me on this earth like momma did? There is no love that sustains, and embraces the spirit and soul, like a mother's love. Dear God, please! I don't even quite comprehend the love she had for me... and why she never challenged my rebellious nature. I can not quite comprehend that love, not having any children of my own... yet I know you still love me God. Despite my failures. And I know in my heart, my mother also loved me despite my failures as a daughter to her. Please forgive me Lord for not loving her back as she loved me. She often told me she prayed to you for a daughter to love... and yet her I was. The most stubborn, unloving, miserable daughter she could have ever had... yet you answered her prayer... but I failed her as a daughter. I failed her. I didn't hold her when she was dying. I didn't rub her feet. I didn't rub her hands. She asked me once, and I just couldn't do it. I tried... but I couldn't do it long enough to help her sleep. She was in so much pain, and yet I couldn't do it. And all my mother desired was love. She was the most loving person I have ever known... and I mean that. She laughed. She loved. She gave. She sacrificed. She was loved by many for her gentle, sweet, loving spirit. God please forgive me. Forgive me for not having the faith that you could have healed her at the time. For being negative. For being selfish. For being me. Please Lord forgive me. And if this message is read by anyone... please allow me to get this point across. We are living in a world that is all about "me, me, me." Everything is "selfies." Put down your pride for one moment, let go of your pain. Embrace your mother. Embrace the love that is from your mother. You will not know that love from anyone else. And if you think your mother isn't very lovable... b/c there are some mothers that perhaps are wrapped up in the world and can't love like they should... if you think your mother is not lovable... give in. Forgive her. And show her the love that she never showed you. By embracing her. Every single person in this world needs and desires to be loved. Everyone. Every single person. Embrace your mother.